Miracle

My goal for this month is to record every day an experience for which I am grateful to have had. Here is the first one.

I have been very anxious to sell our house in order to move into a new home that will better fit the needs of our family. It has been a very stressful month of cleaning, waiting, hoping, while feeling restless and on edge all of the time. So when some other options of how to make this move happen without selling our house first were suggested to me, I lept on them. Finally, something I can take more control over and a way to make what I want to happen without sitting around and waiting for someone to show up.

My husband, however, was pretty against these other options, which I could appreciate were not very financially responsible but sometimes you take risks to get what you want, right?  I was annoyed and even referred to him as a wet blanket to my friends. Why was he squashing all of my hopes? He had been traveling and we had spent very little time together in the last few weeks.  I hadn’t really said anything but he could tell I was frustrated by the house situation and that I was somewhat blaming him for it.

Then he took me on a date. We went out for dinner and to a great movie and had milkshakes. We talked and had fun together and didn’t discuss the house issue at all. Then yesterday we had a quiet afternoon with just the two of us and my husband brought up the house stuff and we talked. I was able to share exactly how I was feeling and he listened. He shared his concerns and as he was speaking, I felt the holy spirit whisper to my heart that he was right and I should listen to him. As he was speaking I remembered a conversation I had had with my neighbor and she commented that this situation was a good opportunity to let my husband lead the family. It was very clear to me that I needed to have more faith and trust in both God and in my husband. In that moment all of the anxiety left and for the first time in six weeks, I felt peace.

I know that marriage is a sacred commitment and union that allows men and women to fulfill their divine potential. As we counseled together in honesty and love, having had taken the time to strengthen our relationship and be in a good place with each other, we were able to reach a decision together that we both feel is the right one for our family. What before consumed my mind with worry and frustration is now in the hands of Heavenly Father and I felt confirmation from the holy spirit that we have done our part and things will work out the way that is best, whether I get what I want or not. I can now say, like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego who were thrown into the fiery furnace, this is what I want, but if not, I’m okay with that too. (Daniel 3:17-18)

I had been praying for a miracle buyer to show up this weekend and put in an offer NOW.  If I pray hard enough and pester him, I thought, he’ll give me what I want, like in the parable that Jesus tells about the widow and the unjust judge. (Luke 18: 1-5) Now however I recognize, through the leadership of my husband and the holy spirit, that the miracle I instead received was a change of heart, a stronger marriage, increased faith and peace.