Dancing with Daffodils

Eighteen years ago I did a semester of college in London. I lived with about 40 other students and a few teachers in a house that BYU owns in Kensington, right across from Kensington Gardens in Hyde Park. I studied English history, Shakespeare and other English literature. We roamed used book stores in Covent Garden and ate Cadbury chocolate bars from the vending machines in the tube stops on our way to the theater where we would wait for cheap, last-minute tickets. We visited so many castles and cathedrals that somehow by the end of the four months they had started to get a bit redundant. It was one of the most wonderful experiences of my life.  Just this week after recently watching The Crown, going to the movie theater to see Darkest Hour and then finishing a fantastic book entitled Victoria, I was literally seconds away from clicking the button to purchase airline tickets to London when the thought crossed my mind that I should probably talk with my husband first. I love Engl...

We're half-way through January and I just sat down a day ago to think about my goals for this year. I always make a list in my journal of highlights from the past year, what I'm looking forward to in the new year and then I tend to make a few goals. This year I felt tired of making the same goals I've been making for years and decided to focus on things that I felt needed to happen now, not goals that are in actuality habits I'll be developing and perfecting over a life time. One of those goals is to do more writing so every Friday I am going to publish a blog post. I have not written with such regularity since I was a junior in college and writing three stories a week for the college newspaper. I am excited for the challenge and hope that my four loyal readers appreciate the increase in content and hopefully quality. January can be a tough month; a letdown after all of the Christmas fun and family time. Some Januarys I have felt the blah and impatient with the wint...

Today I had a true "dancing with the daffodils" moment that I want to remember forever. I had an upsetting experience at church this afternoon and when I got home alone with four tired and hungry children who all seemed to be pestering me for something, I could barely hold my emotions together. I grabbed a tissue and ran upstairs and locked my door so I could cry alone. My eldest saw that I was upset and I could hear her immediately engage her younger siblings who were following me up the stairs. She played with them and I remained almost entirely uninterrupted in the 45 minutes or so it took me to compose myself. When I did come down and start making dinner, she immediately came over and offered to help me. Once it was in the oven, I gave her a hug and thanked her for keeping her siblings busy and told her how much I appreciated her kindness. She asked if I was just stressed earlier and I told her that someone had really hurt my feelings and I was feeling badly about mysel...

I had a goal to read 30 books this year and thanks to a great website that helped me keep track, I did it! Some were long and emotionally intense, some were okay, some were fun, some were so depressing, but each one was a journey and I'm grateful for books and the joy I find in reading. Here is my list! 1. Ms. Bixby's Last Day --I loved this book. So sweet and meaningful. 2. The Midnight Rose --Reminded me of The Forgotten Garden except in India. It was good. 3. House of Robots --I read this to my kids and loved it. It was positive and smart. 4. The Orphan Keeper --Sad but interesting read and I suppose it had a happy ending 5. The Emperors of Chocolate --Fascinating but outdated (it was published in the 90s and a lot has changed since then). I loved learning more about Mars and Hershey and now I look at the candy in line at the grocery store with a more educated eye. 6. The Family Romanov --Interesting, kind of slow, but I learned more about them and that was the idea...

I learned two very important lessons yesterday. First, I am not a performer. Second, practice does not make perfect, unless you can practice in the very environment in which you need to perform. I was having a fantastic day yesterday. We had some wonderful and seriously quality family time, I found a $20 bill hiding in a Christmas mug, and there was the most perfect and magical Christmas snow falling. I was even excited to be participating in my church's community Christmas concert. I have a friend who is an amazing singer and she asked me last year for this same annual concert to accompany her while she sang O Holy Night. I got the music and it has six flats (this means it is challenging) but I spent hours practicing it last year and performed it well enough. I made a few mistakes but felt it didn't distract too much from her performance. When she asked me again this year I was excited because I already knew the piece and therefore could focus on nailing it. I started prac...

Ten years ago we lived in southern California and had season passes to Disneyland. It was a tough year because I struggled getting a job and also getting pregnant, but it was a super fun year going to Disneyland at least twice a month and exploring all that the greater LA area offers. I was also working with some amazing teenage girls at church and I loved them dearly. After two years of trying to get pregnant, I finally succeeded and spent the last month of our annual pass to Disneyland just walking around but not riding rides. The sad part was that then I miscarried and by then our passes had expired. It was too tight financially for us to go back just for a day but right before we moved, one of the girls from church (also a fellow Disney enthusiast) took me to Disneyland for the day. She knew how sad I was over the miscarriage and how I felt like my Disney experience was incomplete and she took me and gave me such a magical day. It is one of the kindest things anyone has ever done...

Sorry for the 4-month hiatus. I've had lots of thoughts floating around my head and haven't taken the time to sit down and develop them. I've decided that I just need to write them down so I'm anticipating a few shorter, perhaps less refined posts over the next few days. Starting off with one on weight. I put on a decent amount of weight with my first two pregnancies but nothing obscene and after the first two kids I used Weight Watchers and managed to lose the extra weight. That got me back to normal (thought not to my ideal) and I was feeling pretty good, especially because I knew I would be pregnant again. After kid number four, I was heavier than normal and then due to some hormonal changes with my body I put on 10 pounds in what felt like over night. At this point I was almost back to my pregnancy weight, which was way more than I really should weigh and I'll admit I was feeling pretty low about it. I started exercising two or three times a week at a gym wi...