January Highs and Lows
I have been loving January. It is clean, simple, unscheduled and snowy. Where we live, as soon as there is even a mention of snow, everything shuts down, so we had a Sunday with no church and a Monday of no school. I love that after such a busy December with lots of outside commitments, January is when we actually get family time. I love that I don't have to feel guilty for sitting under a blanket and reading a book all afternoon because there isn't anywhere I have to be or any fun I should feel like I should be having on such a cold and cloudy day.
The only downside has been my children. I am not sure what is wrong with them lately but I think for all of the reasons I love January, they are struggling. The amount of fighting in our home lately has reached unprecedented levels and I was about ready to buy myself a ticket to a far-away island yesterday. I don't like contention at all and get very stressed when there is yelling or arguing. The constant need to mediate these skirmishes is exhausting and I wish I could just send them all in their rooms except for meal times. Hmmm...maybe even then.
After a horrifying report of their behavior when with a babysitter this past weekend, we decided to take away all TV time (no movies, TV shows, or even learning games on the computer) and treats for the week. My wonderful husband presented this to them less as a punishment but more as a break from the things that are distracting us and making it hard for us to be nice to each other. They were also each assigned a specific service opportunity for a sibling that they are required to do for the week. I was hopeful this morning that things would start to turn around, especially after we took them to the church gym to run around and play basketball, which turned out to be fun family time. However, we weren't home 20 minutes before someone was telling someone else to get out of her room and then there was hitting and crying and blaming and unkind words. One of those kids got sent to a quiet time and one got sent with dad to help a co-worker move some items so that I could do the dishes in peace.
We've had some pretty serious parenting lows during these bleak winter months and while this is a new ride, it is still feels like the same struggle of liking my children when they're making life so difficult and teaching them patiently without locking my door and not coming out until I run out of books to read. I keep reminding myself that I love them and even if I didn't, God has sent them to me and expects me to teach and raise them well so that they can accomplish whatever purpose they were given when they came to earth. I know He will help me with this eternal responsibility and I believe in the power of prayer and fasting for strength and wisdom to handle these situations. Still, the day-to-day parenting struggle is real and I just want them to get along and be nice to each other. The worst part is that I can't make that happen on my own and I am glad no one saw me stress-cleaning yesterday in an effort to find some control in my life. I am grateful to have been a parent long enough to recognize that kids go through phases and it probably won't be this difficult for very long because truth is, I have amazingly good and wonderful children. I have hope that their January blues will wear off, hopefully before my calm, cold happy days of hibernation have to be over.
The only downside has been my children. I am not sure what is wrong with them lately but I think for all of the reasons I love January, they are struggling. The amount of fighting in our home lately has reached unprecedented levels and I was about ready to buy myself a ticket to a far-away island yesterday. I don't like contention at all and get very stressed when there is yelling or arguing. The constant need to mediate these skirmishes is exhausting and I wish I could just send them all in their rooms except for meal times. Hmmm...maybe even then.
After a horrifying report of their behavior when with a babysitter this past weekend, we decided to take away all TV time (no movies, TV shows, or even learning games on the computer) and treats for the week. My wonderful husband presented this to them less as a punishment but more as a break from the things that are distracting us and making it hard for us to be nice to each other. They were also each assigned a specific service opportunity for a sibling that they are required to do for the week. I was hopeful this morning that things would start to turn around, especially after we took them to the church gym to run around and play basketball, which turned out to be fun family time. However, we weren't home 20 minutes before someone was telling someone else to get out of her room and then there was hitting and crying and blaming and unkind words. One of those kids got sent to a quiet time and one got sent with dad to help a co-worker move some items so that I could do the dishes in peace.
We've had some pretty serious parenting lows during these bleak winter months and while this is a new ride, it is still feels like the same struggle of liking my children when they're making life so difficult and teaching them patiently without locking my door and not coming out until I run out of books to read. I keep reminding myself that I love them and even if I didn't, God has sent them to me and expects me to teach and raise them well so that they can accomplish whatever purpose they were given when they came to earth. I know He will help me with this eternal responsibility and I believe in the power of prayer and fasting for strength and wisdom to handle these situations. Still, the day-to-day parenting struggle is real and I just want them to get along and be nice to each other. The worst part is that I can't make that happen on my own and I am glad no one saw me stress-cleaning yesterday in an effort to find some control in my life. I am grateful to have been a parent long enough to recognize that kids go through phases and it probably won't be this difficult for very long because truth is, I have amazingly good and wonderful children. I have hope that their January blues will wear off, hopefully before my calm, cold happy days of hibernation have to be over.
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